Summertime is high season for cheating husbands. Extramarital affairs flourish this time of the year. Many men view summer infidelity as a recreational sport. Some men are seasonal cheaters who only cheat when their wives are away on vacation. Other men are opportunistic cheaters who cheat only when there’s an opportunity do so without getting caught. For both types of cheaters, summer is the ideal time to initiate an extramarital affair.
Most Summer Affairs Go Undetected
According to statistics, 50% to 70% of husbands cheat on their wives. A good percentage of these affairs take place during the summer months. Most of this infidelity goes undetected. Studies reveal that 2/3 of women whose husbands are cheating have no idea their husbands are having an affair. These cheating husbands have several ways hide their summer affairs.
Husbands Play When the Wife is Away
Sharon and Fred always rent a beach house during the summer months. Fred works in the city but drives out to be with his family on weekends, returning on Sunday evening for work the next week. One Wednesday, while the kids were next door with their friends planning a big beach party, Sharon took a train back to the city to pick up some party favors from a closet in their apartment that she thought the kids could use. When Sharon entered the apartment, she found 2 wine glasses on the kitchen counter, the remains of a dinner for two, and candles on the dining table that had burnt down halfway. In their bedroom, on the unmade bed were satin sheets she’d never seen before, and an empty champagne bottle on the nightstand next to the bed.
Some husbands routinely send the wife and kids to the beach, the lake, the country, or to visit relatives in another state. What’s your husband up to while you and the kids are away? Do you know where he is, who he’s with, or how he’s spending his time? Instead of sitting home alone eating a TV dinner, he could be wining and dining his ladylove.
Fictitious Fishing Trips and other Lies
Marcy never gave it a second thought when Hank left early one morning for a 3-day fishing trip with the guys. That afternoon, her neighbor asked to borrow Hank’s pruning shears. Imagine Marcy’s surprise when she went to the storage shed to get the shears and found Hank’s tackle box sitting in the corner and his fishing rod leaning against the wall.
Cheating husbands frequently disguise vacations with their mistress as fishing, camping or rafting trips with the guys. Men know that outdoor activities and other forms of male bonding are unlikely to be questioned by their wives. Is he really hiking the Appalachian Trail with his buddies? Or is he soaking up sun in St. Thomas with his summer sweetheart?
Bogus Business Trips
Feeling uneasy about her husband Larry’s business trip, Claire called his office pretending to be a client needing to get in touch with him. She was told that Larry was on vacation (not at the business conference he told Clare he was attending) and would be unreachable by phone until the following week.
Trysts with the mistress are often disguised as bogus business trips. Even valid business trips can provide the perfect opportunity to cheat away from prying eyes. While he’s attending that summer business conference without you, a budding office romance could blossom into a full blown affair. Are his trips occurring more frequently or lasting longer than usual? Has he tacked on an extra day or two before or after a legitimate business trip so he can spend the time with his lover?
Suspicious Separate Vacations
For months Tom had been trying to persuade Terry they should take separate vacations this year. His excuse was that he needed a break from Terry and the kids. Tom’s efforts to convince her intensified as summer approached. Terry was against it because earlier that year she discovered Tom was cheating, and insisted that he end the affair. She was concerned that Tom might use his vacation time to re-connect with his mistress. To safeguard her marriage, while giving Tom the benefit of the doubt, Terry found a place where they could vacation as a family, while still having their own space. The resort she chose offered spa treatments, sunbathing and shopping during the day for her, golfing and water sports for Tom, a daycare program for their 4 year old, and supervised youth activities for their 13-year-old daughter, and their boys, ages 8 and 10. In the evening, Tom, Terry and the kids regrouped as a family and dined together.
Has your husband suggested that the two of you take separate vacations this year? Do you know where he plans to go, or who he’ll be vacationing with? He could be laying the groundwork for a summer affair. Will he be living it up in Las Vegas with his lover while you’re indulging in a week of pampering at a spa? If you have reason to suspect that your husband could be cheating, you may want to re-think your summer plans.
What to Do About Summer Affairs
If you see telltale signs of a summer affair developing or actually taking place, speak up! Ignoring it won’t make it go away. Let your husband know you’re aware of what’s going on and tell him you want it to stop. If you let him think he’s getting away with his affair or that he has your silent approval, he’ll feel free to do it again next summer. Or worse, he may continue it throughout the year. Though summer affairs usually have a built-in expiration date, some cheaters turn their summer flings into a permanent state of affairs. Your husband could become so attached to his mistress, that he moves in with her or asks you for a divorce.
Precautions To Take
Does this mean you should forego renting that beach house for the summer or put that 2-week trip to your parents on hold? If you’ve seen suspicious behavior or signs of infidelity during the past few weeks or months, this is not a good time for you to be away.
If your husband is a seasonal or opportunistic cheater, don’t make it easy for him to cheat. Stay close to home, keep tabs on him, and stay alert. Follow the suggestions my tip sheet, “How to Prevent or Short-Circuit Your Husband’s Summer Affair.? Plan your summer so he won’t have the time or the opportunity to get involved in a summer affair. Safeguard your marriage by putting some checks and balances in place. Plan summer activities for the whole family and a several romantic weekends for two. Heed this advice, and you won’t have to wonder where your husband is this summer -- you’ll know, because he’ll be with you.
More Information about Summer Infidelity
To request a FREE tip sheet which lists the telltale signs of a summer affair and gives tips on how to short circuit your husband’s summer affair, or prevent him from having one at all, send an e-mail to InfideltyAdvice@gmail.com with "Summer Infidelity" in the subject line.
?copyright 2005 Ruth Houston All rights reserved.
About the Author:
Infidelity expert, Ruth Houston is the author of Is He Cheating on You?- 829 Telltale Signs, which lists practically every known sign of infidelity. For more information about the book, infidelity or cheating husbands, visit http://www.InfidelityAdvice.com
To receive a FREE tip sheet listing the telltale signs of summer infidelity and with tips on how to prevent or short-circuit your husband’s summer affair, e-mail InfidelityAdvice@gmail.com with "Summer Infidelity" in the subject line.